My kid is the smartest…most talented…cannot fail…Will be the best at everything he does in life…
IT STARTS EARLY
I think we begin the comparison game early in life. I know everyone seems to think it’s only since the invention of social media that it has existed, but long before social media we had moms who compared the accomplishments of their children.
I will say, since the invention of social media, the comparison game has become almost overwhelming.
Which brings me to this thought: we all have special talents and gifts and things that no one else can do just like we do. This is really important to understand and help ourselves and our children become the person God meant us to be and not be discouraged because we aren’t like the next person.
I remember a handful of friends, growing up, who I always looked up to. They were pretty, well dressed, and very smart. All the things I wanted to be. I’m still friends with these women and they continued to grow into pretty, fashionable, women…with awesome personalities I might add.
The same goes for my bestest friend in the whole wide world. She is probably the prettiest person inside and out that I’ve ever known…
ENTER SOCIAL MEDIA AND MOTHERHOOD
I’ll never forget getting on Facebook back in 2008. It was my first social media account, and I got it because we had just moved so far away from family and I wanted us all to be able to keep up with each other.
I immediately began the pressure of feeling I wasn’t good enough and having a daughter who wasn’t doing the things other friends babies and kids were doing. It almost felt like a knife in my heart. I so badly wanted to have “normal” or what appeared to be normal on Facebook.
Fast forward to baby #2. Not only did I get the pictured perfect birth that I had mourned with baby #1, but he did everything “on time” or even a little bit early.
Then, there was a third…while nothing was wrong with his birth (another beautiful, wonderful birth) he was delayed. In fact, so delayed that he needs help with gross and fine motor skills AND has now developed a severe stutter.
SO REALLY, CHILL
Why do I share this with you? Because my all of my kids have a talent…they may not be the best at everything…but we will figure out what all of them are capable of and really good at over the next few years and foster that.
Look, we all want our kids to be the best. And really, aren’t they? To us? Not every boy is going to make it into the NBA, NFL, or NHL. And every girl isn’t going to be a prima ballerina or actress or singer…and that’s OKAY!
I look at my Jac and think about how kind and loving she is. She would be great working with people who are sick or who need extra care.
Joseph loves math and to build things. He also loves video games and would probably be great at designing video games.
Uriah is strong. He also likes working with his hands and helping his daddy in the garage.
I’ll continue to nurture their personalities and encourage them, and wait to find out the path they choose in life.
(Let me also add, children develop at different rates. Just because one doesn’t do or does do something by a certain time does not mean they’re never going to do something or that they’re a baby genius.)
Whatever my children do when they grow up, I want them to be happy and do what they love and excel at…even if that means not going to college or if it means spending all the money on college to get a degree they need to work in the field of their dreams. I’ll be proud of each one of them because of hard work, determination, and doing it with honor and dignity.